Momma's Birthday Cake

Sometimes I complain about my little cheap-o camera. But once in a great while there is something so photogenic that even my fujifilm can't help but capture a tidbit of its splendor.

There are two things consistent and predictable in this world. They are: God's undying love and Momma's birthday cake. In fact, I know that the second is the fruit of the first. Only a truly loving God would give me such a dear mother that I don't deserve. Only a blessed woman would make her own birthday cake year after year--and share it.~Birthday Cake Frosting~

9 Tbs. lemon juice

1 can sweetened condensed milk

1/2 cup powdered sugar

1/2 pint whipping cream

green food coloring

Whip and fold in whipping cream. If you can keep yourself from eating most of it, cut the cake in half horizontally and fill in before you frost the top. Momma puts a clean piece of paper over the hole so that the cake has a nice clean look.

Enjoy.

The only cake in this house all year that isn't chocolate. :)

The Pillowcase Apron

Are you looking for a quick sewing project that will give you instant joy along with a lasting pleasure whenever you lay eyes upon it (the project, I mean)? Of course you are. Here it is. You can whip this up in literally minutes, and it is basically stress free in every particular.
And attractive.

And so frugal. Here's how.

1. Grab the loveliest, most wrinkled pillowcase in your mom's stash of bed linens. As you make a beeline towards your sewing machine, wave it in her general direction and say, "HeymindifIripthisapartkaythanks."

2. Spread out your treasure on a flat and fairly clean surface. Respectfully rip out the side seem most of the way up. Leave the top four inches or so unscathed.

3. Now, take out a pencil, pen, or eyeliner or whatever and mark lines across upon which you will cut:

The top, closed portion is the waistband. Next will be two long strips that will be the ties. Finally, the large and beautiful portion is the skirt of your apron.

4. Grab on long strip and press it in half lengthwise. Sew along the raw edge. Turn it rightside out using a safety pin, knitting needle or somesuch long utensil. Press.

5. You may add interfacing (as I did) to the waistband, since this fabric is rather flimsy. Attach the ties to either side of the waistband. Set aside momentarily.

6. Pick up the large and beautiful skirt portion. The topmost edge will be raw where you cut it. There you will make a gathering stitch and gather gather gather until it is the width of the waistband.

7. Tuck the gather inside the waistband about 1/4 inch and topstitch.

8. If there are any raw edges that you find undesirable, hem.

9. If you desire some commendably useful and trendy pockets, you are at leisure to create some.

10. Put on apron. Make some cupcakes. Feel feminine. Smile big.

Almost no hemming + resourceful use of a common household object= happy.

-Kez

I Jesu navn

går vi til bord,

at spise, drikke på hans ord,

dig Gud til ære, os til gavn,

så får vi mad

i Jesu navn.

Years before this present day my mother had a Carl Larsson-esque idea of a hand painted border around our kitchen. In the true nature of Norwegian decor, our house contains striking primary colors along with rustic dusty barn wood and the remnants of peeling wallpaper.

The border was to happily not be in English but rather the language of the vikings. The following was inspired by a decorative platter that has been in our family ever since my Grandma bought it at Stabo ten years ago. Yellow acrylic paint from Meijer. Bliss.

"In Jesus' name" is what meets your eyes when you first enter and leave the kitchen.

This has to be one of my favorite projects. While I was standing on the counters and trying not to drip paint on the stovetop I liked to think I was Suzanne in the Larsson painting above. I only wish my hair was that long.

In Jesus' name

To the table we go

To eat and drink upon His Word.

To Him the glory, us the gain,

We'll then have food

In Jesus' name.

The Scientific Stages of the First Blog Post

I

Cliche comment about how cliche it is to write a blog. I try to get across that I'm perfectly aware that I'm making myself vulnerable unto the scrutiny of those vicious commenters. I hope to thus stun the crowd with my insight. A mixture of modesty and ego.

Example: Yes. Another blog. . . Another blog in which the blogger will write about stuff that annoys her, stuff that she finds funny, stuff that she's made, stuff that she freaks out about. Another blog, but mine is more spectacular than all the rest, as you will see.

II

Welcome anyway, even though I laugh at myself for being cliche. ha! ha! Though I don't think so, or else I wouldn't be writing so much about myself.

III

Hopes and dreams for my little Baby blog. This blog will magically motivate me to write more often and be more cleverer than in real life. I just want to share my gift of inspiration. (A noble cause, no doubt!)

IV

This paragraph is me through my eyes and what I want your eyes to behold when you read this blog. Often contains introductions to the author's family and pets, many sentences starting with "I love ___." to show how original they are to love that particular item/craft/food/animal. Blunt sentences, apparently very honest and sure to give you deep insights into the mind of the author.

Ex: I am obsessed with the movie Pete's Dragon. I love mouse pads. My favorite food is cream of wheat.

V

Insincere apologetic comment on length and inane content.

Ex: Here I go again! Blabbing about myself! I bet you're bored! Tee hee!

VI

A small chuckle at themselves and pointing out that this is a foretaste of posts to come.

Ex: Might as well get used to it! I'm just like this all the time!

VII

Second thoughts. Stay and listen to me! I'm boring, but you hafta listen! It'll get better! I promise!

IX

May or may not conclude with a name.

Ex: XOXOXOX (gag),

The Sew-sew Crafty Thrifting Vintage Thread Girl

I hope you realize that this is said with the utmost snark, considering I just described every first blog post of my life. There have been many, my friends. They're the best.

Dear Reader. . .

Now I'm all shy.

After spending a vast amount of time making this blog beautiful and aesthetically pleasing for your eyeballs. . . I find myself hesitating.

As we know, hesitation is the downfall of all bloggers. If the author does not have the confidence of mold and the charisma of a root beer float the blog is doomed to fail. Thankfully I am an expert in all things root beer and I am improving in leaps and bounds on my moldy side.

To win back your favor after that last statement I will offer you many endearing empty promises for this blog:

a) I will post mediocre pictures of my creative projects.

b) I may post recipes and mediocre pictures of spectacular delicacies.

c) I may just post a link to my friend Yammie's blog, instead.

d) I will unabashedly quote, imitate, and pretend I am one of the fantastic sewing bloggers on this thing called the World Wide Web.

e) There might be some original posts, too.

f) There will be lists.

g) There will be a post explaining why I am addicted to lists.

h) I will probably talk about my family and friends and cornmeal.

i) I'm throwing around the idea of movie and book reviews as well. (this is where you comment and say yea or nay)

j) I will strive to present this blog in the most interesting way, while inspiring you to go on to greater things and know that our talents come from one source, Jesus Christ our Savior and Creator.

k) I'm tempted to use the rest of the alphabet.

l) I'll have mercy on you. This time.

m) I entreat you to read and enjoy this B-log. It may be a blessing in disguise.

P.S. Here's a treat: